Feisty Faith

My youngest son’s second hand surgery was scheduled and my father was in the last stages of Alzheimer’s in his 50’s when I was called a “Feisty Faith Girl” by Regina, a dear woman of God whom I admire very much. She knew I was believing God for miracles for my baby and for my daddy. Let me tell you why.

I honestly wasn’t sure how to pray for my daddy. I mean, Alzheimer’s is basically a terminal illness. Then I heard a song in church one day about Lazarus, and it reminded me that my daddy wasn’t dead yet. I determined that I had read plenty of Scriptures instructing me to pray for healing in every situation, but had never seen anything saying not to. So I believed with everything in me that he would be miraculously healed of Alzheimer’s.

All the while, Garrett was born with Poland’s Syndrome. I still remember the day when I finally said the words “birth defect” out loud. Once again I wasn’t sure how to pray. So many people have so many worse challenges in life that I wondered if it was even right for me to pray for healing since many of the anomalies could be corrected with surgery. God gave me two signs that I was definitely to pray for healing: 1) I was in a revival service and the preacher spoke of how his wife had taken a fall and was scheduled to have every bone in her face reconstructed, but God miraculously healed her, and 2) I was in a Bible study and the teacher spoke out of Mark 3:1-5 about Jesus having the right to heal on the Sabbath. All I heard was that Jesus had healed a man’s shriveled/withered/crippled right hand, so I claimed that for my little one.

I wish I could tell you that God provided a miracle and that my daddy is healthy, but that wasn’t in God’s plan. So at the age of 59, my dad lost his struggle on this earth and went on to the ultimate healing.

Again, I wish I could tell you that God provided that miracle and my little boy didn’t have surgery, but that wasn’t in God’s plan. So he had four surgeries before his fifth birthday. The surgeon is talking about doing more when he’s bigger, but you know what, I am still believing for a miracle!

By this point you are probably wondering, how in the world I can still have “Feisty Faith” since it seems that my prayers aren’t being answered like I want? Well, let me tell you about some that have been answered.

This first one is about me! This seems a good time to point out that I was raised in church, and I don’t ever remember not being a Christian. Romans 10:17 (NCV) tells us that “Faith comes from hearing the Good News, and people hear the Good News when someone tells them about Christ.” Praise God for parents who told me the Good News that gives me this Faith that I’m telling you about today.

After years of seizures, I was finally diagnosed with epilepsy at 7 years old, and I don’t remember ever not believing that God would heal me of it. I had read in Scriptures such as Matthew 4:24 that Jesus had healed all kinds of things…even epilepsy. I also knew that “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever” ( Heb. 13:8, NCV). Therefore, if He did it for them, he would do it for me. I was at the altar getting anointed every chance I got, and one day, when I was 15, God healed me! This year I celebrated 21 years of being epilepsy free!!

Fast forward 6 years when I stood on a promise from God. A dear friend had lost a baby to Group B Strep infection, so when I tested positive for it in week 38 of my first pregnancy, I sought the Lord. In that altar, He promised I would not lose my baby. 2 weeks later, my labor was far from ideal. The infection was so bad, it made me horribly sick. It had even gotten into the placenta, which should have been fatal for my baby, but God protected Caleb from the infection. That’s not all! He was born with the cord wrapped around his neck twice, not breathing and fluid on his lungs. They said he might be in the hospital up to a week, but he only stayed one extra day. Today this miracle child is a loving, intelligent, athletic, godly, funny 15 year old who is becoming more like his dad every day!

Why am I sharing these experiences and what do you take with you from them? It’s not just for the chill bumps and fuzzy feelings.

Hebrews 12:1-2a, NCV reminds us that “We have around us so many people whose lives tell us what faith means. So let us run the race that is before us and never give up. We should remove from our lives anything that would get in the way and the sin that so easily holds us back. Let us look only to Jesus, the One who began our faith and who makes it perfect.”

So, why not give Feisty Faith a try. Live a life that tells others what faith means. Run the race, and never give up. Look only to Jesus!

Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

I must say I am so glad that God equips us and our children with what we need for the lives we've been given. I have said for a long time that my little Garrett is a handful because he is so determined and so decisive. Yes, this causes a lot of challenges in parenting/teaching him, but properly channeled it will continue to be a tremendous benefit to him. His determination helped him endure 5 surgeries before his 6th birthday not to mention a number of other challenges. So, if you are struggling with a challenge or parenting a child who challenges you, figure out what God has equipped you/your child with just because He knew you would go through this one day.

Psalm 139:13-16
¹³ For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be.

Lessons from the Sideline

We have just wrapped up another season of middle school soccer and our first season of high school soccer, and we are still in a season of recreational soccer as I finally sit down to write this. Honestly it’s hard to find time to write about being a working mom with kids in sports when you’re busy working and attending sporting events. Some have suggested I tell you about a typical day for me. I have given that a lot of thought, and have come to one conclusion:  there is no such thing as a typical day. Every single day has a different schedule and its own set of challenges and triumphs. As a result, I have learned/am learning many lessons through being a soccer and cross country mom. Here are just a few.

First of all, with three kids and working full-time, 

I can’t, and don’t have to, do it all. 

My house is never going to be as clean as I would like it to be during soccer season. As frustrating as it is, we do what we can, and the rest will be there when there are no games to be played. As much as I hate it, I can’t even be at every match or meet. I just can’t be in two (or three!) places at once. First Peter 5:5 explains, “All of you should be very humble with each other. ‘God is against the proud, but he gives grace to the humble’” (NCV). So, I have learned to depend on others, and friends or parents of other athletes provide rides in a pinch and my husband texts updates from the events he attends. My boys’ schedules take priority over my social and volunteer schedules, so weekly dinners at our home are put on hold, and others are recruited to help facilitate my Wednesday night Bible study. Learning to ask for help is difficult for someone as independent as I am, but it has been very humbling and rewarding. 

Secondly, flexibility is key.  

Since I am unable to control the weather, my husband’s work schedule and the outcome of games, my schedule is a constant work in progress. I deal with this by checking my color-coded online calendar, making plans A, B and C, and waiting for each day to unfold. This resolve to “go with the flow” does not come naturally for my “Type A” personality, but it has been refreshing for me. After all, “we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” Romans 8:28 (NIV).

Finally, my kids (and the world) are watching me
while I’m watching my kids. 

 I recently sat at a middle school soccer game next to a family I have been sharing the sideline with for eight years. I watched the dad offer encouragement to his son on the field, and his words were immediately echoed verbatim by his sweet five-year-old daughter. This reminded me that I set the example for my children. At another game I sat between two moms who are faithful members of my church.  One of their sons has even spent a lot of time in my home. Both of these moms were supporting their sons on the opposing team. This reminded me that I can’t behave any differently on the sideline than I would in the pew. With that in mind, it is clear that sports are a great way to fulfill God’s instructions to parents in Deuteronomy 6:5-7 (NIV):   “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts.  Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” Every practice, every game, every out-of-town tournament, every win, every loss, every time they are MVP, every time they sit the bench, is an opportunity to teach our kids the Word of God.

Whether it’s our kids, other parents, coaches, referees, or umpires, Billy Graham’s words ring true:  “We are the Bibles the world is reading; We are the creeds the world is needing; We are the sermons the world is heeding.” 


Note:  This article also appeared in the June edition of Good News Christian Magazine.

Supermom? Where?

Supermom! 

How do you do it? 

You should write a parenting book.

You make having three kids look easy.

I'm as surprised as you are that all of these things have been said to me! Here's the thing:  I am no supermom; I don't know how I do it; what in the world would I say in a book?; having three kids ain't easy.

Let me let you in on a little secret. We thought we knew so much when we started having kids. Boy, were we wrong! I was 20 when I got married, and 21 & 22 when I had my first two boys. It's like I tell my boys sometimes, "I've never been a parent before. I'm still learning how this thing works, so sometimes you have to cut me some slack."

At this point in our journey, my husband and I both work full-time. His hours fluctuate anywhere from 15-60 hours per week. He pastors an outreach chapel on Sunday mornings, and I lead a Bible study on Wednesday nights. Our eldest son goes to high school on the other side of the county from our youngest son's elementary school (30 minute drive). The middle son goes to middle school in the middle of town. This spring the older two are playing soccer with their schools, and the youngest is playing on a rec team. The eldest is active in his youth group and small group. The middle son is a student leader with his youth group. We host a dinner for up to three other families at our small home nearly every Friday. We have no extended family here.

Are you tired yet?!

I think those people who think I have it all figured out just don't see me on the days that the songs that run through my head have lyrics like (brace yourself):

"'Cause I'm losing my sight
Losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Losing my sight
Losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Nothing's alright
Nothing is fine
I'm running and I'm crying
I'm crying
I'm crying
I'm crying
I'm crying"
(Papa Roach, Last Resort, just this part of the song, ignore the rest)

OR

I cannot take this anymore
Saying everything I've said before
All these words they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
Less I hear the less you'll say
You'll find out that anyway
Just like before...
Everything you say to me
Takes me one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe
Cause I'm one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
I find the answers aren't so clear
Wish I could find a way to disappear
All these thoughts they make no sense
I found bliss in ignorance
Nothing seems to go away
Over and over again
Just like before...
Everything you say to me
Takes me one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe
Cause I'm one step closer to the edge
I'm about to break
Everything you say to me
Takes me one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe
Cause I'm one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
Break break break break break
Shut up when I'm talking to you
Shut up shut up shut up
Shut up when I'm talking to you
Shut up shut up shut up shut up
I'm about to break
Everything you say to me
Takes me one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe
Cause I'm one step closer to the edge
I'm about to break
Everything you say to me
Takes me one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe
Cause I'm one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to
BREAK!
(Linkin Park, One Step Closer) 

Oh, wait, we're not supposed to admit we think like that sometimes, are we? If you have never had a day like that as a parent, I would love to hear how you manage. Anyway, I guess I should talk about how I get through days like that. Here are my thoughts:

1) I am learning to cut myself some slack.
2) I admit when I'm overwhelmed.
3) I seek God's face. I pray for the ability to be merciful to others as He has been to me.
4) I spend time in God's Word daily. (If you want to know my theology of parenting, check out Deuteronomy 6:4-9. I may do another blog about that.)
5) I prioritize. I know I can't do everything, so I have to choose what's most important even if it makes someone upset with me.
6) I remind myself they're only little once (even if the high schooler has several inches on me). One day I'll miss all this busyness, and keeping them active keeps them out of trouble (and leaves them no time for girlfriends).
7) I try to take care of me. There's nothing better than a girls night out with supportive girlfriends.
8) I admit when I need help. I have wonderful friends who I know will show up at 11:00 at night with Tylenol and Gatorade for my post-operative 6-year-old when my husband is out of town with the other two kids, or who lets my kid ride the bus to high school from her house, or just text me to see how an appointment went.
9) I try my very best to take it all one day at a time. Matthew 6 tells us that tomorrow has enough worries of its own.
10) I chose well when I got married. He's loving, supportive, and patient. And, he is most definitely the man of the house. I am still learning through trial and error, success and failure, to submit to him.
11) I love my kids with every fiber of my being. No matter how frustrated I get, they are my world.
12) I have wonderful, flexible bosses who let me put first things first.
13) I get wisdom from other moms who have raised successful, godly young men as I am trying to do.
14) I try not to compare my life to others' lives. My kids successes and failures are their own regardless of what other kids do. I am not as skinny as some moms I see. I have been a stay-at-home mom, and I have worked both part-time and full-time. I nursed them all for about a year. They go to public school. What is best for me and my family at any give time may not be right for someone else's family. What is right for someone else's family may not be right for me. We're all just doing the best we can with the babies God has loaned to us.

These are some of the things that work for me. I would love to hear from other moms what works for you.

NO Chick-Fil-A For Me!

I am very aware that today is Chick-fil-A Customer Appreciation Day. I will not be participating for several reasons; most of them are the same reasons I never go to Chic-fil-A any other day.

1) Eating out is a luxury rarely afforded to our family. When we do eat out, it's usually $5 Hot-N-Ready Pizzas from Little Caesar's. I try to cook better food for my family at home, and spend our money on other things.

2) Chick-fil-A is on the other side of town. There are umpteen restaurants between here and there.

3) Chick-fil-A is overpriced.

4) I have work all day and church tonight. I don't have time to wait in lines that wrap around the building. I'm gonna let all the other Dan Cathy fans do that. I'm sure he won't notice I'm not there!

Oh, you thought I was going to say something about freedom of speech or my belief in traditional marriage. Do I need to say that? Ok, fine.

Of course I believe the man has a right to his opinion. I'm just not going to hang out at a fast food restaurant all day to prove it. (Though I fully support any of you who have made the time to wait in line!)

Yes, I believe in the Biblical definition of marriage (one man, one woman, one God). I'm just not a fan of pointing out other people's sins. I am going to try to focus on the planks in my eyes before I start picking and choosing specks out of others'.

And that, my friends, is my 2 cents on something that I'm sure will be forgotten as soon as something more interesting comes along.



Luke 6:41 (NIV)
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?

2012 July

7/29
Dewayne preached an xcellent message on Jesus calming the storm. Lots of stuff I've never thought of before.

7/19
Made the mistake of asking the 14 yr old what we still need for his birthday party.
 

7/14

Caleb has been accepted into the honors academy at WVHS in every possible subject.

7/7
Family Movie Night


7/5
Well, I suppose 15 years is quite an accomplishment in today's world, but I can honestly say I love Dewayne more now than ever.

2012 June

6/27
Wish you all could have heard my husband preach tonight. Best sermon I've ever heard on the Armor of God.




6/24
Brought Dewayne home to Texas for his birthday. I think that's a pretty good gift!

6/13
Humbled by reading the awards my father received during his military service. Some of them are very specific to his performance during particular missions/trainings. I don't even remember seeing them before which is, in my opinion, a testament to his humility. While he had his fair share of faults, I am honored to have been his daughter even if it wasn't for as long as I would have liked.
 

I'm Baaaaaack.....

I've been thinking about this old thing lately. Didn't realize it had been two years since I posted on it. I did keep up with a different blog/journal for a portion of the last couple of years, so I will probably do a blog post with those contents. Anyway, I'm gonna give this another shot. The way I see it, I am a person who still has a lot to learn and a lot of growing to do, but I also have a lot to offer. So for anyone who is interested, I'll be posting all kinds of things: family activities, devotions, recipes, crafts and more. Also, I have recently come to the conclusion that I don't enjoy talking on the phone (could be because that's part of what I do for a living!) and I know there are some people who would like to know more about what's going on in Gruber World, so this is for you at least. More to come. I hope you enjoy!